দিদির সঙ্গে খুনশুটির দিনগুলো

বাবা, মা আর কুণাল ছাড়া আমার ঝগড়া করা এবং রাগ দেখানোর আরেকটি লোক হলো আমার দিদি।আজ দিদি ফেসবুকএ আমাদের দুজনের ছোটবেলার একটা ছবি পোস্ট করায় ছোটবেলার অনেক স্মৃতি মনে পড়ে গেল আর সেই স্মৃতি চারণ করতেই আমার এই লেখা। 

আমি যখন জন্মাই দিদি তখন বছর চারেকের। মা এর কাছে শুনেছি মা নাকি যখন ভোরবেলা স্কুলএ চলে যেত আমার দুধের বোতলটা তৈরী করে দিদির হাতে ধরিয়ে দিলে ওই আমায় দুধ খাইয়ে দিত। 

দিদি আর আমি দুজনে খুবই বিপরীত স্বভাবের সেই ছোট থেকেই। দিদি যতোটাই শান্ত আমি ততটাই দুষ্টু। এই বয়সে নিজেকে দুষ্টু বলাটা কতখানি ঠিক জানি না তবে এখনো মা তো তাই বলে। আর আমার নিজের মেনে নিতেও কোনো অসুবিধা নেই। আমি নি:সন্দেহে খুব পাজি।  ছোটবেলায় আমাদের খুব ঝগড়া ঝাটি এমনকি মারামারিও হত।  মারামারি টা তবে  আমিই শুরু করতাম। তার পর দিদি যখন আমার একটা হাত ধরে বেঁকিয়ে ধরত তখন আমি মা মা করে চিত্কার করতাম। গায়ের জোড়ে কোনো দিনই পেরে উঠতাম না। চুল ধরে টানাটানিও হয়েছে অনেক যাকে বলে চুলোচুলি।  আমার কত চুল যে দিদি তুলে দিয়েছে তাই বোধয় চুলের আজ এই অবস্থা। 

জয়পুর বেড়াতে গিয়ে একটা লেপ কেনা হয়েছিল মনে আছে।  লাল হলুদ রঙের সাটিন এর লেপটা দেখতেও যেমন সুন্দর ছিল, তেমনই ছিল বিশাল বড়। অনায়াসে দুজন গায়ে দিয়ে শোয়া যেত। কিন্তু লেপটা কেনার পর থেকেই আমি ওটা কাউকে নিতে দিতাম না। নিজে একা গায়ে দিয়ে শোব বলে খুব ঝামেলা করতাম।  একদিন ও  দিদিকে  নিতে দিতাম না। দিদিরও খুব ইচ্ছে করত ওটা নিতে কিন্তু আমি খুব জেদাজেদি করতাম। এই নিয়ে অনেক বকাও  খেয়েছি মা এর কাছে। আর যেই একটু গরম পরে যেত তখুনি ভালো মানুষের মতন দিদি কে বলতাম " এবার তুই লেপটা গায়ে দে" ।

যেই একটু বড় হলাম মানে যখন দুজনের জামার সাইজ এক, তখন শুরু হলো আরেক বিপদ। দিদি খুব বলত দুজন দুজনের জামা এক্সচেঞ্জ করে পরার কথা।  আমি আনন্দের সঙ্গে ওর  জামা গুলো পরে বেরোতাম কিন্তু আমার জামা গুলো দিদি পরলেই ঝামেলা করতাম। আর দিদি খালি বলত " কি হিংসুটে রে তুই, একটুও শেয়ার করতে শিখলি না "। 

আরেকটা জিনিস নিয়ে খুব ঝগড়া হত সেটা হলো দুপুরবেলা মা এর পাশে কে শোবে। আমি কিছুতেই দিদিকে মা এর পাশে শুতে দিতাম না।  এমনকি মা কে  মাঝখানেও শুতে দিতাম না। 

তবে এত ঝগড়া মারপিট খুনশুটির  মাঝেও কিন্তু ছিল একটা বন্ধুত্বের সম্পর্ক।  একই ঘরে দুজনে থাকতাম এবং দুজনের দুটো পড়ার  টেবিল ছিল।  আমাদের ঘরটা ছিল তিন তলায় আর মা বাবা থাকত এক তলায়। পড়তে বসেই শুরু হত দুজনের গল্প।  সারাদিন স্কুলএ কি হলো , এটা ওটা আর যেই সিঁড়ি দিয়ে মা এর পায়ের আওয়াজ পেতাম অমনি দুজনেই চুপ।  মা বুঝতে পেরে একদিন কোনো শব্দ না করেই যখন ঘরে ঢুকে পড়ল সেদিন কপালে জুটেছিল  ভীষণ বকুনি আর তার পরেই দুজনের পড়ার  জায়গা হয়ে গেল আলাদা। 

জীবনের একুশটা বছর এক ঘরে এক সঙ্গে কাটিয়েছি দিদির সঙ্গে।  তার পর আমি চলে গেলাম বাইরে পড়তে আর কিছু দিন পর হয়ে গেল দিদির বিয়ে। তার পর থেকে আর কটা রাত যে এক সাথে কাটিয়েছি সেটা গুণে বলে দেওয়া যায়।  এখন দেখা হলে সারা রাত কেটে যায় গল্প করতে। গত পাঁচ বছর তো এক শহরেই থাকা হয়না।  এখন সপ্তাহে একটা দিন স্কাইপিতে কথা বলার জন্য অধীর ভাবে অপেখ্যা করে থাকি।  অনেক সময় নিজেদের ব্যস্ততার কারণে সপ্তাহে এক দিনও হয়ত কথা বলা হয়ে ওঠে না।  

কোথায় হারিয়ে গেল সেই ছোটবেলা। কোথায় হারিয়ে গেল সেই ঝগড়া মারপিট আর খুনসুটি করা।  ভীষণ মিস করি সেই সব দিন গুলো।  ছোটবেলায় মনে হত কবে বড় হবো আর আজ মনে হয় ছোটবেলাটাই ছিল সবচেয়ে ভালো।  

My feelings when Jojo started going to play school

Ever since Jojo was born, I was waiting for the day when he will start going to a play school.  After we arrived in Finland the most important job for me was  to find a good play school for him. I was so excited to visit the schools and so happy to feel that my child has grown up and finally that big day has arrived when he will start a new journey of his life. But I never had a clue that once the door will be closed and he will be separated from me for few hours, the little one will crowd my thoughts. 

Jojo started going to school at the age of two and half years and for all these years I thought that once he will start going to school, I will have some free time to spend on my own as I was the only one to take care of him at home since his birth. But finally, when the day arrived, I was thousand times more tensed than my husband. Besides being happy I was worried thinking about how he will manage to stay alone without me, for how long will he cry, whether he will eat his lunch, whether he will behave properly at school and many such things.

I still remember it was a snowing morning and we struggled a lot to reach the school. I was more depressed when I left Jojo at the door and the teacher holding him in her lap as he was crying madly. That separation was very painful for both of us. Though the teacher consoled me and said that its very natural for every mother getting worried seeing her child crying but I felt very sad and my eyes too filled with tears. Since we had just moved to a new country, everything was new to  Jojo and so I was more anxious whether he would get adjusted with the new environment, new people, new language and everything new around him.

As I left school, I felt so lonely. I wanted to talk to someone but since my husband was busy in a meeting, I couldn't call him and since we were new to  Finland, I didn't have any friend that time to share my feelings. Those three hours was the longest time I waited till now and every five minutes I was checking time and thinking when will I meet Jojo again. After I returned home, the empty nest made me more sad and I started missing him around me.

But when I reached school and saw him playing with his friends I took a deep breath and said to myself that children are more adaptable to changes than us. And within a couple of days when he got settled and started saying goodbye to me without tears, I was relieved that at last my child started enjoying the company of his lovely teachers and other kids.

How motherhood has changed me and my life

Today while reading an article on motherhood, I realize how my life has changed over the last three years rather how I have changed. I am sure its not only about me, almost every woman changes on being a mother. By change I mean the way you see things and the way you start analyzing every minute detail. 

I remember before the birth of my son, I never let anything come between my studies and work. Initially studies and then my profession were the topmost priority of  my life. But the day Jojo was born, I was reborn. My whole world changed and from that day onward my child became my topmost priority. Sometimes I really cant recognize myself, how one can change so much? Then I realize its all about motherhood.Now before making any major decision in life, I never put myself first, its my son who is given the priority.    

Earlier neither I used to care about the time nor the weather outside before I go out but now, even if I had some urgent work, I had to be on time to pick him up from school. Every time we plan for a vacation, we had to check the weather forecast and not only vacation even if I go out for grocery shopping I check the temperature outside. Now even in order to avoid getting drenched up in rain I keep an umbrella in my bag through out the year. Because I am scared if I fall sick who will take care of Jojo. Now responsibility comes prior to enjoyment.

Cooking was never my hobby nor I knew anything about it. But now in order to make my son eat properly I had to make cooking my hobby. Every evening I had to think about what lunch I will pack for him on the next day at school. Not only that, now I have become an expert cook for the sake of my son because at any time of the day he may demand anything. Specially when he becomes sick this goes to extreme. For the past few days Jojo is suffering from cough and cold and is not at all eating but yesterday suddenly at lunch time while he was watching some cartoon show he said that he wants to eat noddles. I was surprised that how come he is asking for food and then realized that his favourite cartoon character is eating noodles. And within ten minutes I had to prepare it otherwise he would have skipped his lunch. 

Never thought of getting poop on my fingers but if you are a mother atleast once in your lifetime you must have that experience while changing diaper of your child. Quite a few times I had that experience while changing my son's diaper and I didn't ever mind to clean it with my own hands. 

Sleeping for six to eight hours in the night at a stretch will become history once you become a mother. Specially in the initial days it is very difficult to wake up in the middle of the night to feed your baby but right now I think I am used to these breaks at night. Now automatically I wake up at night to check whether he has taken the blanket or if he needs water to drink. And if he has got fever, just cant sleep to check his temperature every hour.

Usually I take very less time to get prepared for going to a party or a wedding reception but now I could get ready withing seconds even if it is to wear a saree. It may sound funny but its the reality. After making Jojo ready, if I could comb my hair and wear a proper dress is enough for me now.

 Kids usually demand for toys while going to a super market and Jojo is not an exception to this. So every time I have to be careful to avoid going to the toy section and do my shopping as first as possible. And thus before going out for grocery shopping I always make a list before so that it would save some time and I could quickly get my stuff. 

I just couldn't remember when I last went to watch a movie at a multiplex. Now watching a movie at my own laptop is a luxury to me that also when Jojo goes to sleep. 

May be I have lost some of my freedom of sleeping, going out for movies or spend some time before the mirror but I really enjoy the challenges of being a mother. The tender touch of his little fingers and his innocent looks make me the happiest person on earth and every time when he comes running and hold his little arms around my neck, I really thank God for bringing those changes in my life and making me understood about selflessness and patience. 

Prague - the beautiful city of Europe I would like to visit once more !

Yesterday while talking to my old friend on skype who is planning to visit Prague next summer, I recalled our vacation to Prague in 2010. Yes, Prague, the capital city of Czech Republic, is one of the most interesting, historical and beautiful places in Europe I have still visited.The magical city of century old bridges, magnificent cathedrals, gold-tipped towers and domes, situated in the surface of Vltava River for more than ten centuries are enough to meet the thirst of a traveler's thirst for adventure.  

Our journey started from Budapest by bus via Bratislava and we reached Prague in the afternoon. Since we were over enthusiastic to explore the historical city, we didn't waste a moment staying in the hotel and relax. After keeping our bags and baggage we rushed to the Prague Castle, one of the largest castles in the world, covering almost an area of 70,000 metre square. The history of the castle dates back to the year 870 and I was really amazed by its architectural beauty. The castle houses several towers, cathedrals, palaces, museums and gardens and though we really got tired of walking down the cobbled roads inside we couldn't resist exploring the majestic 9th century castle. 

I remember it was raining that day but that didn't stop not only us but several tourists who had come from different parts of the world to visit the age old castle. 

The buildings were so huge that it was really difficult for me to take a picture but somehow I sat down and managed to take one. 

Surprisingly while coming back and walking down, it stopped raining and beautiful sunshine added to the glory of the city which I tried to capture from the castle. 

Our energy was still left and so we quickly went through the map to plan our next destination and decided to visit the old town square to witness the Charles Bridge, the famous historic bridge, the construction of which was finished in the beginning of 15th century and lying crosses the Vltava river. 

The statues of several saints situated across the bridge was not only unique but eye-catching too. 

My legs were literally paining and so we decided to walk sometime down the lanes of old town square and get back to hotel to store some energy for the next day.

Next day our destination was Vyshrad, the historical fort probably built in 10th century on a hill over River Vltava. The twin towers of the Basillica of St Peter and St Paul are 58 m high and I have to really raise my head high to see the top of the towers. Rebuilt in a neo gothic style, the basillica has a stone mosaic above its entry. 

Walking down the lanes of the Vysehrad we came across the cemetery, which I found the most quiet place inside the fort. It was my first visit to a burial ground and also a memorable one. Many famous artists, musicians and politicians have been buried there. The peaceful atmosphere around was really enjoyable and I never had the idea before that a cemetery could be so beautiful.

After reaching the top, we saw the ruins of the Bath of Libuse. According to legends, it is said that Princess Libuse used to take bath with her lovers there and later threw them in the river. The mesmerizing view of the ruins from the hill top was quite amazing and hearing all those age old stories I could feel the historical importance of that beautiful place.   

One more interesting thing we had seen is the famous Astronomical Clock mounted on the southern wall of the Old Town Hall and which was installed in 1410 and said that it is the third-oldest astronomical clock in the world. Its really interesting to know that the astronomical dial represents the position of the sun and moon in the sky and displays various astronomical details. 

I have written whatever I could remember but I think there is lot more to tell about this lovely place. Prague is one of the most beautiful places of East Europe and if I get an opportunity, I would love to explore this historical and magical place once more. 

Lunch at our new Finnish friend's place

Today we had a nice experience of visiting and interacting with a Finnish family in Helsinki. Let me first tell you how we get to know each other. After Kunal joined the Aalto university in Finland, we came to know of a program called Aalto Staff Family Friend Program conducted by the university itself. Its like, if we want to meet some Finnish family, to know more about their culture and life, there is a provision that we could avail. Since we both were keen to know more about Finland and its people we filled in the form so that the HR coordinator of the program finds a perfect match with some finnish family, who too are eager to meet some foreigner coming from a different country. Finally few days back we got a mail from the university and they introduced us with Mrs Anne Petroff and her family.

After an exchange of few emails we came to know about each other,our interests and hobbies and today she invited us at her home for a lovely lunch. She is working as an HR in the university while her husband is a senior lecturer at Aalto itself. When we reached, it was really nice to find them waiting for us in the courtyard. The table was decorated with a beautiful table cloth and some flowers. They welcomed us with a drink and we had a little chat sitting in the lawn. They also planned for a barbecue outside but that has to be cancelled because of the rain and so we went inside to have our lunch. They were really kind and gentle and thus not even for a second we felt that we are meeting them for the first time. Since their kids are all grown up, they couldn't find any toys for Jojo to play with. But Mrs Petroff finally got some children story books from his son's book shelf.

Usually I am not fond of pets but Kunal and Jojo love animals. So when I saw their pet dog Hesu, I was little scared but frankly speaking the dog was quite timid and didn't bark at all. I thought Jojo will be little scared to touch him but surprisingly at first sight Jojo told him Hello and put his hand on his head. He was not scared at all rather started playing with it. Mrs Petroff has beautifully decorated her drawing room with some glass lamps, green plants and other show pieces. I was really moved by her choice and creativity. At the same time feeling terribly scared of Jojo who may at any time break any of the glass pieces which were very much accessible to him. But all my fear were in vain. I saw him sat properly in the sofa and playing with Hesu and he didn't touch a single thing. 

Jojo make lot of problems while eating, he needs a cartoon show to be on in the laptop every time  he eats and everyday I have a tough time while feeding him. In order to avoid all these I was sure to have Jojo his lunch from home so that I don't have to struggle with his food at our new friend's home. But surprisingly when we all sat for our food, he said that, he too would like to join us in the table and taste some Finnish food. Me and Kunal just looked at each other because we were expecting some nuisance that he will create at the table. But again he proved us wrong. He maintained all the table manners, ate properly with fork and spoon by himself and not only that he had carrots and cumbers in salad which he never eats at home. More than being happy I was astonished by the way he behaved and when Mrs Petroff and his husband praised Jojo for his good behaviour and well manners I was smiling and thinking that perhaps he behaves like this at home, then I would be the happiest person on earth.

We tasted some typical Finnish food like boiled potatoes, smoked salmon, creamy mushrooms, cheese salads that ended up with some strawberries, ice creams and hot coffee. I took some Indian food which too we shared and they just loved it.

We really enjoyed and had a great time with Mrs Petroff and her lovely family. We get to know more about Finnish culture, Finnish food and life style and it feels good too to talk about your own country and its people. Overall it was a nice experience of cultural exchange. I look forward to meet them soon at my house for lunch or dinner which we are planning sometime in the next month. 

কুকুরের ফেসবুক একাউন্ট

কুকুর বলে কি আর মানুষ নয়? মটেই না, বরং মানুষ বলে কুকুরকে গালাগালিটা না দেওয়াই ভাল।  কারণ কুকুর আর যাই হোক মানুষের মতন বিশ্বাসঘাতক প্রাণী নয়। কিন্তু আপনারা কি জানেন আজকাল কুকুরাও  ফেসবুক একাউন্ট খুলছে।  এমনকি তাদের  ভালো নাম দিয়েই খোলা হচ্ছে যেমন ধরুণ মৃণালিনী দেবী, গৌরিপ্রসাদ গাঙ্গুলী , দ্বিজেন্দ্রলাল মুখোপাধ্যায় ইত্যাদি ইত্যাদি। মানে ওই টমি জ্যাকি দের জমানা চলে গেছে বা নেহাতি সেগুলো ডাক নাম হয়েই রয়ে গেছে। পদবিটা তার মালিকেরই ধরে নেওয়া যাক। 

সম্প্রতি একজন সেলেব্রিটির ফেসবুক একাউন্টএ চোখ পরতেই ব্যপারটা নজরে  এলো। উনি নিজের পোষা কুকুরের নামে একখানি ফেসবুক একাউন্ট খুলেছেন। শুধু তাই নয় ইতি মধ্যে ওই অবলা প্রাণীটির তিনশোর উপর ফ্রেন্ডস। হে ভগবান তাও যদি বুঝতাম সবাই তারই সমগত্রীয়, কিন্তু তা তো নয় সবাই যে ওই সেলেব্রিটিরই ফ্যান মানে সেই হিংস্র মানুষগুলোই । আচ্ছা কুকুরটি কি জানে যে তার মালিক একজন সেলেব্রিটি ? 

কুকুর্ প্রেমী বন্ধুগণ, প্লিস কেউ ব্যপারটা পার্সনালই নেবেন না। আমার ব্যপারটা একটু অদ্ভুত লাগলো এবং মজারও বটে তাই আরকি দু চার কথা না বলে পারলাম না। যদি কারোর কোন পোষ্য থাকে তাহলে তো সে তার নিজের একাউন্ট এই তার ছবি বা কোনো ভাল লাগার মুহূর্তকে শেয়ার করতে পারে।  আলাদা করে আবার তার নামে একাউন্ট খোলার মানেটা ঠিক আমার  মোটামাথায় ঢুকলো না। 

The most Romantic Walk I ever walked....

Yesterday while reading some news about Darjeeling, suddenly I remembered the trip that we planned after marriage. Back in 2008, Kunal and me decided to go to Darjeeling but because of certain political disturbances there, that time we had to cancel our dream tour and planned to visit some other places of the Dooars region of West Bengal. After spending two days at Jaldapara, we came to Murti located in the Jaipaiguri district and stayed in a cottage of West Bengal Tourism and Development Corporation Ltd. There we planned to stay for three more days but within two days we visited almost all the places we could and so one more extra day to do nothing. 

But we didnt want to waste that extra day by sitting in the hotel and so after having our breakfast we took a van and went to Chalsa, a small town in Jalpaiguri district.  From there we took a bus and reached Samsing, a small hill village and a famous tourist spot.  It is needless to say about the scenic beauty of the Dooars region. Since its very near to Darjeeling district and because of the indefinite bandh going on that time at Darjeeling the place seemed to be very quiet. We hardly saw any tourist except a few local people. We didnt know where to go and which way to go.  We had neither GPS nor a google map with us, so we kept on walking towards the hill. After a while we asked someone and came to know that after walking a couple of kilometers we would reach Rocky Island, another tourist attraction but since that would fall under Darjeeling district, it would not be safe to go there  because of the Bandh.

But the mesmerizing beauty, the fresh air, the beautiful landscape and the quietness all around tempted us and thus we couldn't resist to walk towards Rocky Island. Not even for a moment we were scared, rather quite excited to walk all the way towards our destination. We bought some candies from a shop and started walking. Except us there were not a single human being on road. Both of us were totally engrossed in the endless beauty of glistening green and the blue sky. Suddenly we saw a dog was following us. At first I was little scared but it never barked. We gave him some biscuits and he kept walking with us. We passed by the little houses located here and there in the corners of the hills. At first I thought it would be quite hectic to walk but the endless beauty never made me tired. After walking quite a long, we heard the soothing sounds of flowing water and realized that we are very near to our destination. Finally when we reached the Rocky Island, we became speechless by the beauty of undisturbed nature and spend an hour  along the river side. Few shops were located  by the side of the river but not a single one was opened. Located on the banks of River Murti, I found it to be a heavenly destination.

I was not in a mood to leave that place soon but we had to because it was becoming dark. The sun was about to set and so we again started walking back. Strangely this time also the dog  followed us till we reached Samsing. On our way we were quite hungry and had some noodles in a small shop which was about to close. Since there were few minutes left to leave the bus, we roamed around the place and suddenly came across a place where the road has ended abruptly and we found a deep valley with steep sides alongside of which was standing a dilapidated tea garden villa. Through the glass windows we saw how beautifully decorated it was and for a moment I envied those lucky ones who lived there. Finally we came to know that the bus has been cancelled. It was almost dark by that time but fortunately we got a jeep that brought back us to the hotel.

First time in my life I enjoyed walking a long distance. This time my legs were not paining and not even for a moment I was tired. Rather it was quite refreshing. While walking, I wished this walk to be never ending. Perhaps I fell in love with  nature and its breath taking views.